Power to the parties

India has a unique multi-party political system. Given the diversity of culture, religion and languages, it reflects in politics where there are dime-a-dozen parties in each state. The Election Commission surely has an enviable job keeping track of all these jokers.

Of the entire lot, the most confusing and confounding are the ones in Tamil Nadu. Like the names of people, the names of parties are also tongue twisters. The two main parties are called AIADMK and just DMK. It means All India Anna Dravida Munnetra Kazagham and Dravida Munnetra Kazagham. You might think that the DMK probably came out of the AIADMK. But no, it's the AIADMK which was born of DMK. Usually they break out with bigger names to indicate where they came from and what they stand for.

The AIADMK started a trend. Soon you had the PMK, DMDK, VCK, MNMK, PDK, UTEMK, KIP and so on it goes. Obviously, I cannot expand all these abbreviations here since it will take two days. Wooing all these letters are the big sharks; Congress and the BJP. Of course you have the ususal suspects like CPM, Janata Party and BSP also vying for attention. Now you can see how wonderful this scenario is and what a party this Indian democrazy has become.

Teesra number platform

When the battle lines are drawn and both sides look like winning, Indian politics throws up a "Third Front" to confuse the papaya out of you. This is like the googly in cricket. This time, many of those who cannot see eye-to-eye yet with the two main parties - Congress and BJP - have climbed on to a platform and called it the Teesra number platform. Or for convenience let's call it a "Teesra" similar to the "doosra" in cricket.

So this teesra is a very interesting combination of parties, some with ideologies while some only with ideas and some without both. But they represent the length and breath of India, I should say. The list so far includes Left Front, JD(S), Telugu Desam, Jaya DMK, Maya BSP, Biju Janata Dal, and a few other smaller parties.

Now, how in the hell are these people going to form any working government, we have no clue. If anything they should be like a train which has engines on both sides with the eject pilot buttons in the passengers' hands.

The Congress has called it an "opportunistic alliance" as if they are something different. On their part, they seem to be having a sidey relationship with the SP in UP what with Amar Singh making grunting noises everyday about how close to each other they are but how still apart. The BJP has dubbed the teesra a "Parking Lot" which means the parked vehicles can pull out anytime. Unfortunately for them, it's their partners who have been pulling out though.

The stage is being set slowly for a grand finale and let's wait and watch who will offer the best laughs!

Promises to keep

Poll promises are not a new thing in Indian elections. In fact all of us are well-versed with election manifestos and how utterly useless documents they are. Now, what is a politician without a promise huh!

And so it has come to pass again that our friends have been making tall promises; as tall as... hmm... let me see... coconut tree? No... too short... ah as tall as Eiffel Tower!

For eg. aspiring Prime Minister Aduvani ji recently released his Party's "IT Vision". He said that if his party (Bajapa) is voted to power, he will make laptops available to all students at Rs 10,000. Hmm... that's nice. Wondering if his son-in-law has taken an agency for Dell or something. As for students they will soon have "mu me Ram, haath me jhaange (laptop)."

Now that's not all. If voted to power, he will also give free mobile phones to people below poverty line! Wah wah Advani...ji... taliyan! So now the poor will have a new slogan: Mobile, Kapda aur makaan. Because his mouth will be so bissi talking on the mobile that he may not need to eat "rotee". He he he...Very clever.

Sanju baba bola chalo Dilli

Every elections the Indian poll scenario gets more interesting, more murkier and more entertaining to those who can see the funny side of things. This blog is about that funnier side. So no offence meant at anyone or anyone's party. Rather all offence meant at those who cannot take a joke. Hey just joking... now don't get serious yaar. Aaaj ka taaja khabar suno aur khush ho jao...

Today taaja khabar is about Sunju baba. Baba bola chalo Dilli and that too from Lucknow the land of Nawabs. He also had a nawabi topi on when he said it and that too red in colour. Now Prakash bhai Karat is certainly not going to be amused at this new guise of our Munnabhai Politician.

Our Bajapa chaps are fuming at all this nautanki in this famous and erstwhile Atal seat. But kya hai na bhai, yeh elecson hai... yahan pe bole tho note phekneka aur tamasha dekhneka... kya!